Re: [BardonPraxis] digression..

["Rawn Clark" <rawnclark@...>]

Dear Chenxsi,

>> These few days it seems as if i am feeling less and less motivated to
continue IIH...in fact, i seem to have lost interest in everything!
I've thought alot about why i've become like this, and it appears that i
no longer find it meaningful to do anything at all. For the past few
weeks i've been living life like an aimless zombie, not caring much
about anything anymore. Sometimes i do feel less spiritual, but this
time, this is serious! <<

It sounds like you are depressed. When you're depressed, the labor of
initiation can seem especially pointless.

Depression is not a place worth staying. It's just plain boring! To
get out of depression, you've got to do something exciting for yourself,
something that will put a smile on your face and get your blood flowing!

This may well be a side-effect of your soul mirror work. In the
beginning especially, the subconscious mind will try its best to
maintain the status quo and will offer all kinds of resistance to
progress. Depression and apathy are common examples of this. They
completely disable your will to self-change.

>> Whatever the case, what exactly is the meaning of pursueing knowledge
and wisdom in general? What is the ultimate goal of doing such things?
And when you have achieved that goal, what next? Do you go on and on
forever? If this question never came to my mind in the first place, i
do not think i will be like this right now... <<

These are not questions that another person can answer for you. You
must discover the answers for yourself. No, that's the wrong wording .
. . rather, you must *create* these answers for yourself. *You* must
create for yourself a reason for pursuing the Mystery. *You* must
create for yourself the ultimate goal worth striving for. And when you
achieve your goal, *you* must decide what to do next.

My best to you,
:) Rawn Clark
07 Jun 2003
rawnclark@...
rawn@...
http://www.ABardonCompanion.com
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BardonPraxis
http://E.webring.com/hub?ring=arionthebardonwe