When Introspection Leaves The Student Feeling Alienated
© 2003
>> To be honest, the daily concerns of most people is beginning to feel like a chore to listen to. I am sure people are noticing this new behaviour. I even notice people getting mad because I do not choose anymore to "participate" in their emotions as I may have before. I also choose to keep my spiritual life very private and never talk about it, but there are always clever people who notice things... Does anyone here on the list have similar experiences and any advice how to deal with people that are happy not to ask questions in this world of delusion? (that shouldn't be read as condescending). <<
Well, no matter how I read it, that does sound condescending, or at least as if you've divided the world into 'people like me' and 'people like them'. I think this is a fairly common stage or phase of the introspection/self-change work indicative of our turning outward what should only be turned inward -- judgment.
I suggest that you examine these feelings very carefully for what they are. In essence, this is an aspect of the need to feel superior to others as a means of making oneself feel "okay". It's a putting down of others to raise oneself up. The end result of this is that one finds oneself all alone.
There's an old saying that what offends us in others are the things that offend us within our own selves. When the behaviour of others raises our judgmentalism it means that we see the same propensity in ourselves but we'd rather not admit it so we look down on them as a sort of cover to hide what is also within us. In this way we avoid responsibility for what is within ourselves. The path of character transformation however, demands something more of us. It demands that we instead turn that laser beam inward and root out that propensity within *ourselves*. How the other person acts is their business but how *you* act is *your* business.
My best to you,
:) Rawn Clark
20 Nov 2003
>>My friend recommended that I might volunteer to help less fortunate people - he believe it really helps one to connect more to people and develop a deeper love for mankind. <<
It can, but not when it's done for selfish reasons. If it's just about what *you* can get out of it and not about simply *doing for others*, then it's not *giving*. Instead, it's just a more subtle version of *taking*. Giving is what breeds compassion, not taking.
>> During my meditations last night, I was reminded there are people like Victor Frankl, who did not judge his captors and managed to create peace from within. Quite a mighty feat considering his circumstances. <<
The key to this is the recognition of yourself in others. This begins at the level of the mundane self. For example when you encounter some one who is stuck in a very petty, surface-of-existence life, you see your past self which was at one time living that same sort of life. You remember how painful and bleak that was, compared to now and you feel compassion for their plight which was once your own. You see some one who is swept away by their anger and you see all the times that you too were swept away. In other words, compassion for another is first the recognition of how much alike you are, and then the love you feel for your own self pours forth into the one you are like because of your commonality.
As the individual consciousness expands and the memories of one's past incarnations surface, one experiences commonality with just about every act imaginable, from the most horrific to the most sublime. And when the awareness merges with the Divine, you share commonality with *every* thing, *every* who, what, when, where and why.
My best to you,
:) Rawn Clark
21 Nov 2003