Re: Socialization

["antiloop1111" <jasoncorell@...>]

Hello again Daniel,

> I find it very difficult to accept that the problem is in my 
> surroundings and not in some facet of my own actions, but I just 
> don't know what is it, or what can I do...?

Do not blame yourself for their actions. If you still find it 
difficult, perhaps you have travelled too far in the opposite 
direction. There is no need to be overly "soft", or otherwise people 
will trample all over you. Remember the pillars of mercy and 
severity, do not travel in either extreme, take the middle path.

When they ask you or get upset at you for not getting angry, just be 
honest with them:

"Look you guys, you all know that I used to react with anger before, 
but after years of acting this way I have come to the conclusion that 
being angry does not make me feel happy. Who can say that they are 
happy and at the same time that they are angry? When I realized that 
didn't make sense for me, and that I was not happy, I decided to 
change myself. So now I chose not to act angry and I feel much better 
this way. What you chose for yourselves is your prerogative. Only you 
can know what is best for you. I believe I understand your situation 
because I used to react in anger like you did, but you each have 
minds of your own and you each have choices, so if the choice to be 
angry is not making you happy, then try a different approach. Please 
don't judge me for trying to be a happier person, I am not judging 
you for being angry, all I am saying is that I can understand it 
because I used to act that way. I accept you the way you are, I am 
feeling some pressure from you guys and I wish you would also just 
accept me for who I am."

If all else fails and things get worse and you are having a hard time 
being amongst them, then remember the words of Confucius: "If justice 
& righteousness does not prevail in a kingdom, then leave it!".

In the same way you chose not to be angry, you will have 
opportunities to make other choices. Just be careful you do not 
sacrifice your own well being, progress and happiness for their 
ignorance, suffering and anger. This is not to sound pretentious, it 
simply looking at the facts.

Cheers,
antiloop1111