Re: [BardonPraxis] First 3 steps- questions-experience-clarification

["Rawn Clark" <rawnclark@...>]

Dear 'setiamon',

>> 1 step detachment,one is supposed to center oneself and not get lost
in thought trains,The question is how exactly?when a thought train
starts outside of my detached state my mind naturaly travels with the
thoughttrain even while maintaining a centered conciousness,if i
completly center myself that would cease the thoughttrains and be no
different then the 3rd excercise of emptyness of thoughts.DOes this step
mearly mean not to lose all of ones self to the external sphere of
thoughts?is it okay to let some of myself move with the thought train as
long as the totality of my will isn't asorbed into it? <<

No. Just *observe*. This is different than "following" a train of
thoughts. Just observe, without *any* involvement, whatever transpires,
even if by detaching from participation in its workings, your mind
happens to quiet itself. Just *observe* :)

>> 2 one pointedness of mind:I have been doing image oriented meditation
for nearly a decade now but if i understand reading previous post this
isn't what it means(suprise to me) and that i should be only meditating
on the underlining thought-seed or thoughtpattern,the thing is
automaticly when i think of a thought the image appears in my mind(maybe
as a byproduct of years of visualization excercises) I supress the image
aspect of the thought to a greater degree but its always there in the
darkness behind the boarder illuminated by its own light,Infact I
expereince it like standing infront of a room with many halls(being the
unconciouss) extending out from the thought(metaphoricly of course) each
hall leading to a seperate sense-information room,like image, smells,
sounds, texture, taste and so forth,the question is do I supress the
halls the best i can and mearly focus on the thought?I could use a more
nuanced discription of this part <<

Instead of suppressing the image, you *focus your whole attention upon
the thought/idea*. If images are a natural part of your thinking then
so be it, just don't focus upon the images and forsake the *thought*
itself. This exercise is about *mental* discipline and doing with your
mind what *you* want it to do, which is why the exercise begins with
remaining aware of yourself during normal day-to-day activities.

>> 3 emptyness of mind,When supressing thoughts i find my awareness
shifts to subtler things,not thoughts but aspects of my body and not
mearly the physical one, <<

Yes, this is normal and is the point of the exercise -- it introduces
you to the other, bigger part of awareness that is not bound or limited
to thoughts and thinking. There are countless levels to awareness and
by practicing EOM consistently, you will encounter each of them, one
after the other. The big thing to watch out for is a reversion to
*thinking* about the new layer you've encountered. EOM is about
*BEing*, *perceiving* and *experiencing*, but *never* about thinking.
Thinking comes *after* the EOM session, not *during* it. EOM is, in may
ways, also an extension of the first mental exercise in that it requires
detachment when you encounter a new (to you) layer of awareness. Each
layer is observed/perceived but not pursued (at least not within the
context of your EOM session).

>> i find it diffacult to supress this awareness but when i do i meet
the biggest stubling block (fear) and the uncharted territory beyond
that... I find that at a point fear manifest as shadowy presence outside
of my body infact its almost like my energy or aura is being streched
off of my body and being formed into slight presences,shadowy presence
which i find very diffacult to ignore so much that i tend to open my
eyes and see these images,usually shadowy figures of men, <<

EOM is based upon a prior mastery of the first two mental exercises. I
suggest that you master those exercises before you engage in EOM. It is
clear that you are not exercising any mental discipline (i.e., your mind
is being led instead of you directing your mind) and you are reverting
to a *thinking* mode.

>> I did the soulmirrors deal and long since symbolized my fear as the
water element,weak and vulnerable feeling,so i try and visualize myself
as fire etc and it does cut some of the tension,but i need this part
illuminated better by someone who's crossed this fear area... <<

The solution is the character transformation work of Steps Two and Three
during which you will face each one of your fears head-on and transform
them. But within the context of EOM, the task is to detach from
*participation* of any kind in those fears. Just *perceive* them and
let them go. BE *with* them.

>> also I'v had other negative presence experiences when fear hasn't
arisen in my mind in meditation,very strange and negative ones for
instance <<

All of this is resolved through the character transformation work which
leads to an Astral Equilibrium of the Elements.

>> The best i can guess is that this is my mental body???I'm not sure
what i should do at this point.. <<

*Within the context of EOM*, you should just perceive it and let it go
and, above all, don't revert to *thinking* about the experience *during*
your EOM session.

My best to you,
:) Rawn Clark
16 Dec 2004
rawnclark@...
rawn@...
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