>> I have recently stopped my meditations, etc due to the fact that my life will not allow it ATM. I believe this will help me a great deal in one way though, I see that I need to have stabilized my life more. This will help a great deal when I re-start. <<
Good for you! :) This sounds like a wise decision, my friend. Now that you have a good idea what changes you need to make in your circumstances so that your life will support the Hermetic Work (instead of being a hindrance to it), you are in an EXCELLENT position to re-shape your life so that *it fits you*, instead of continuously fitting yourself around its demands. Cool! How exciting! :)
I remember that moment well and looking back, I recognize it as a VERY fertile one!!! It opened me to taking control of my own life. It liberated me to begin consciously shaping my life to what *I* wanted it to be. And what *I* wanted it to be was supportive of the Work of IIH! ;-) At that moment, I *knew* that I couldn't simultaneously re-shape my life AND carry on the IIH exercises. I felt a strong pang of guilt over the decision to forego the IIH exercises but assuaged it with the strength of my determination to re-shape my life and with my determination to re-start the IIH Work as soon as I *knew* it was time.
About six months later, my longing for the Work became so strong that I re-started Step One and drew up my second soul mirror. But a month in, just after I'd completed the mirrors themselves, I realized that my life's circumstances still weren't what they really needed to be. In the process of deciding whether or not to *temporarily* halt the IIH exercises once again, I came to the realization that the reason why circumstances didn't yet match desire, was rooted in my character itself. This brought me to the decision to continue on with the mirror work of self-transformation AND temporarily forego the IIH exercises, thus appeasing my strong desire for the Work and the necessity of further changes in circumstances.
Sure enough, the work I did in self-transformation of my negative character traits, freed up every last bit of resistance in the changing of my life circumstances! Within five months more (about one year after my first temporary stop), I was ready to truly take up the Work. I never put it down again after that. :)
That at least, was my rhythm. I have no way of telling what your own rhythm might be. It will be interesting to see, as it enacts itself. :)
If you don't mind a bit of advice [and if you do, too bad! ;-)], don't forget that, although you won't be doing the exercises proper, you can still continue with the transformation and improvement of your character. This is the sort of work that's carried out through your every day life and you will be able to make great progress in this regard during your "off" phase. Then, when you do re-start the exercises, you will have that much less work to do and will pass forward through the Steps all that much faster.
The work you've already accomplished has changed you and you can always build upon and strengthen those changes in the interim.
My best to you,
:) Rawn Clark
13 Nov 2002