Socialization

["Daniel Gutmanas" <noxerus@...>]

Dear Friends,

Recently, there appeared a problem which I keep repeatedly 
encountering. Whenever I am with a person who gets (for example) 
angry at something, for whatever reason, I help them calm down and 
relax. After that, they usually ask me if I think they did okay by 
getting angry. I tell them that I see anger as a perfectly natural 
reaction, especially in the situation they were in. Then, follows 
the problematic question: "do you think it would have been better 
not to get angry?"
I cannot lie to them, and I tell them that I do believe that anger 
is a negative reaction, and it is better to be able to transform 
that anger, but in no way does it make their reaction less natural.
After that, I usually get called "non-empathic, not-exactly-human-in-
a-weird-way", etc. The same thing usually follows an event when 
I "should have" gotten angry, but reacted in a completely different 
way. People find that the standards I've set for myself are 
unnaturally high, and for some reason, they distance themselves from 
me because of that.

As much as social alienation is a price I am willing to pay for 
Initiation, it's a price I firmly believe should not be on the 
pricetag!
These people are my friends, and are close and dear to me. I can't 
deceive them by acting out my old negative features, but as I don't, 
they find it disturbing.. Is there anything I should change in 
myself, that I oversighted in this whole thing?

I would very much appreciate any opinion, from anyone.

Sincerely,
Daniel Gutmanas