A few observation-questions

[mds <@...>]

Greetings Rawn,

Over the past week I've been pursuing various elements of Step I, 
trying to get them to 'gel', make sense, grow with them, etc. As a 
result of these efforts, I've observed a few different things which, in 
a way, contain questions which I feel might be best answered with the 
aid of those with greater experience.

The first group - and currently most prominent set - of observations 
are to associated with EM; namely, conscious breathing. Having grasped 
the 'topology' of what's going on (that is, the Mental-Akasha 
connexion, cyclical nature etc) I'm now left with a bit of an impasse: 
how to visualise the bodies. I seem to be having steady progress 
(albeit languid) in generating an idea (such as 'health' - I've been 
using the same one for the past 2 weeks when experimenting) and 
inhaling it. However, the actual transfer itself I find hard to 
visualise, and I'm stumbling quite drastically when it comes to 
visualising the astral- and mental- matrices. I'm a little perplexed as 
to how one is expected to visualise what, at this point in the 
initiation; they are still arcane theoretical concepts as yet taken on 
'faith' so to speak. Circulation of the idea in terms of flowing of 
blood etc. is relatively accessible; the bodies aren't.

So that's the Physical experience.

Other observations that I'm hoping will generate a bit of feedback on 
are to do with my pattern of practice. I've found it hard getting 
morning sessions to go smoothly; 1600 always seems far more productive 
than 1000 for the most part; later evening's fine too for Astral Mirror 
composition. Indeed, reclining soon after waking seems to inhibit 
rather than yield results. Also, for the thought control exercises I 
found the relaxation from lying down incredibly beneficial but I'm not 
so sure that this is true of EM. There have been moments, such as 
making a cup of coffee just prior to composing this post, when I tried 
to inhale 'one conscious breath' of health. It felt in some respects 
more productive than the reclining 10 minutes I spent trying this 
prior. Lying down in the morning feels forced and confused, standing up 
relaxed and receptive - and perhaps calmer? - seems to work better. Is 
the finding that lying down all the time to practice the exercises 
isn't necessarily the most productive way to go about them?

I've also been trying to compose a regular schedule, though this is too 
proving difficult. I think in part this has to do with the inchoate 
nature of practice - not being 'quite sure' that the exercises are 
going well enough, not 'quite sure' what's supposed to happen etc. 
Doubt seems to prevent full commitment to 1hr in the morning, 1hr in 
the evening. The latter is often more accessible as I mentioned above; 
I feel more aware, more willing, more focused later in the day.

Many thanks for the time taken to read this - and my apologies if the 
above just appears as a rambling tirade. I was unsure whether positing 
my confusions would be the most beneficial thing to do, but from past 
experience of the enlightening responses from Rawn and the group, I 
have gone ahead. I hope this was not too presumptuous.

Regards to all, my thanks again,
Fraternally,
Marc