Re: Doubts about the path

["David Yeh" <ldreamr@...>]

Rawn,

I guess I would also like to reiterate and elaborate on my resistance 
to the Bardonian path based on the overwhelming amount of 
information. It has certainly not been easy to grasp many of the 
concepts and I suppose I have been under the misapprehension that 
learning should be easy.

It is just that I don't quite have a sense of what and how much I am 
supposed to know, in terms of theory, at any particular stage. 
Amongst the beginning pages of IIH, there is the picture of the 
Magician tarot card, for instance, and several pages later a listing 
of the different parts of the body and their magnetic and electrical 
aspects. As a beginner in the Bardon system, with no prior 
background in tarot or any other aspect of Western esoteric 
traditions, what am I supposed to do with that? Is it information I 
should memorize? Is it something I should set aside because 
understanding will naturally come as I explore later steps? Is the 
text something I should pore over and meditate on to get a deeper 
understanding? If so, is it implied that this is something that I 
will do on my own as I progress, though not laid out explicitly in 
the steps?

I know for instance that I have gained a clearer understanding of the 
four elements from doing the soul mirrors. But I didn't actually 
know that I would get a clearer understanding until I was doing the 
soul mirror exercise. It was helpful to read Rawn's commentary 
suggesting that the student not worry overmuch about getting exactly 
the right elemental categorization at this stage, but overall I kind 
of feel like I have been thrown into a pool at the deep end without 
knowing too much about swimming. It gets worse when people talk on 
the message boards about the Qabala. I guess I become worried about 
what I should know but don't, because being fresh out of the school 
system (and poised to jump back in in a couple of years), I am used 
to having my education structured and externally guided.

So can somebody just tell me to figure it all out for myself, just so 
I KNOW that's what I have to do? :) Or give me some pointers or 
resources?


Thanks,
David